Humble and Kind

You know there’s a light that glows by the front door

Don’t forget the key’s under the mat

When childhood stars shine

Always stay humble and kind

My mother-in-law visited us in Panama a few weeks ago. We call her Gee.

Her sister came along, too. She is called Kelley. I guess Kelley is my step-aunt? Whatever the case, they flew all the way from Boise, Idaho to Panama City, Panama. Gee had to get a passport to achieve this travel. It was her first passport. Just for us. We were really, really proud of her. To say that Panama is out of her comfort zone is like saying that Superman is strong. It’s a real big understatement.

She showed up late at night. I was glad of this, because just about anywhere in Panama outside of the city is a third-world country. I hope no Panamanians read that. They get real offended to hear it. To their credit, Panama City is a modern metropolis that rivals Manhattan. Where I live is very different. I knew that seeing dead stray dogs on the road, and houses that look like they have been bombed, and trash everywhere, and barbed wire fences and the such would freak her out. I needed to ease her into that to a certain extent. That’s why I was glad it was night time: she couldn’t see any of it.

We got stopped in a Police checkpoint on the way home. I was driving illegally, but they didn’t know it. The Police didn’t know it, either, and I didn’t intend him to know. We went on our business, but they were a little weirded out by it. “Just to make sure no bad guys are out”, I told them. I’m sure that’s true.

We got home and it was a very emotional reunion. My wife has a very special connection with her mom, and honestly: I do, too. Gee is such a cooky old lady. Her hair is crazy, and so is her brain. I love her to death. We said our hello’s and went to bed that night, satisfied that everyone completed the Boise-to-Gorgona transaction safely.

Go to church ’cause your mamma says to

Visit grandpa every chance that you can

It won’t be wasted time

Always stay humble and kind

Next day, Gee sprained her ankle on the Pacific Ocean. We should have warned her not to stand where the waves crash, and crash they did. Later, the wave that broke her became a thing of infamy. In retrospect only, it was 200-feet high and it was a miracle that anyone lived. In reality, I don’t remember anything notable about it. But then again, she got smashed by 5 or 6 waves before she was hurt. The ankle proved difficult for the remainder of the trip. We spent a lot of time in the pool and resting, so that she didn’t have to overexert it.

While she was here, we went out to Pizza. This was the same night that I had ventured into the city to get a cool new roof rack installed on my Jimny. On our way to pizza, the skies were clear and beautiful. I drove Gee because of her ankle, but everyone else walked. The pizza place is called Torito’s, and it’s fucking amazing. Minutes into sitting, Central America kicked in, and we were deep in the guts of a torrential downpour. We had to move our table, so as to not be in the path of splashing water. The power went out and we could only see each other when the lightening exploded. It was quite the pizza night. Afterwards, I pulled the tiny Jimny back to be as close to the exit as possible. I opened the door, folded the front seat forward, and we crammed 6 people into a car barely large enough to fit 4. I cherish that memory.

While they were here, Halloween happened. We had a great time dressing up as each other. Well, everyone else did. I didn’t get that memo, so I dressed up as my favorite movie hero: The Dude. My wife dressed up as me and made a lot of fun of me. I am confident that if I ever met myself on the street, I would hate him. Halloween is weird in a tropical area that doesn’t celebrate it. It’s warm and no leaves are turning. I am so used to bundling up to trick-or-treat, and bringing some Bailey’s to stay warm. “Trick-or-Drink” is what Taige and I called it. You could smell the trees, the dead leaves in the air. The brisk cold made it so that you kept progressively telling the kids to hurry up more so that you could get home and cuddle up while they counted their candy.

That kind of stuff is hard to let go. You try not to think about it.

When it’s hot, eat a root beer popsicle

Shut off the AC and roll the windows down

Let that summer sun shine

Always stay humble and kind

Don’t take for granted the love this life gives you

When you get where you’re going don’t forget turn back around

And help the next one in line

Always stay humble and kind

We have been making a Panama playlist on Spotify as a family since arrival. Each of us will add a song every once in a while. It has 47 songs in it now, and the math on that is very suspect.

While Gee and Kelly were here, we asked them to add a song each. Kelley chose “Panama” by Van Halen for obvious reasons. Gee chose “Humble and Kind” by Tim McGraw. I am listening to it now as I write this and blinking tears out of my eyes, because I am thinking of this other very important memory. The memory goes like this:

It was the day before Gee and Kelley left back to America. It would be months before we saw Gee again, and who knows how long for her sister. Their flight left early in the morning, so they decided to leave for the city in a shuttle the day before. They were leaving at 2:00. It was 1:55. Taige was in the kitchen, folding clothes to stay busy. This was her coping mechanism for losing her mom. I was totally fine, and not crying. I’m usually pretty good at good-byes. I had turned on the radio, just playing our playlist on shuffle for background noise.

Humble and Kind started playing. We all tried to keep our shit together, but we failed. Taige stopped folding clothes, and started crying uncontrollably. Her mom was there with her bags, ready to go, and held her close. We all hugged as hard as we could and took nothing for granted. That moment seemed to freeze, and we were all in this timeless bubble of emotion. We felt happy for our time, sad for the time we had to wait, grateful for our incredible family, a kinship from going through the fire to meet up in another country. We felt proud of each other, we felt excited and nervous for our futures, we felt our shared histories, and we felt our shared futures. We felt each other in that moment, and it was beautiful.

Then the song ended. And they left for their homes. And we stayed in ours.

And I will always remember my time with them. And I will always try.

Hold the door, say “please”, say “thank you”

Don’t steal, don’t cheat, and don’t lie

I know you got mountains to climb

But always stay humble and kind

When those dreams you’re dreamin’ come to you

When the work you put in is realized

Let yourself feel the pride

But always stay humble and kind